Cultural exchange

“I’ll be right back with a refill of your Coke.”

To most Americans, this innocent phrase likely does not even register in the spectrum of consciousness. Be it McDonald’s (insert the name of your ubiquitous fast food chain of choice) or a sit down restaurant, the soft drink refills are expected and never given an afterthought. The never-ending fountain of Coke (insert the name of your favorite soft drink). Hmmm. This small expectation is simply understood in America, just like larger portions per meal. Its part of the culture you grew up with and likely take for granted.


To Russians experiencing America for the first time, this innocuous phrase from the server might be met with a jaundiced eye – one of scorn and skepticism. “How dare they assume that I will pay for another drink without first asking me?!” might be the words of the inner voice about to be spoken. Simple phrase. Simple, but real, adjustment.


You see, in St. Petersburg where I was raised, this simply never happened. Even at the McDonald’s, things are based on the culture of the host country. When my American husband, then boyfriend, first traveled with me to Russia, he wanted to visit a McDonald’s to see how true it remained to what he knew. At the counter, he requested a hamburger prepared without pickles, mustard or ketchup - plain. When I relayed the order in Russian, the crew stood and returned a stare to me. I had to explain again what he wanted and, eventually, they agreed to prepare the order as requested. To my husband, this was uncommon and unexpected. I explained to him that Russians just did not request a menu item at McDonald’s to be prepared differently than the standard expectation.


To his satisfaction, he mentioned that had his eyes been closed he would have been unable discern any appreciable difference in location. I call this a cultural exchange, albeit a small one. The Russian crew at McDonald’s prepared food a different way and the American customer received exactly what he expected. Perestroika in action.


While my husband and I maintain that people are essentially the same everywhere, regardless of language or customs, these two everyday experiences in restaurants, each from a different perspective, showcase how small expectations can lead to large differences in acceptance.


I wish you all the simple enjoyment of “cultural exchanges” to make getting to know one another a fascinating journey.